When Validation Helps, and When It Hurts
External validation is a tricky thing. At its best, it can be fuel. Someone telling you your work mattered, your effort showed, your presence was felt. At its worst, it becomes a crutch, something you chase just to quiet the doubts in your own head.
The line between the two is thin. Healthy validation lifts you up without replacing your own self-belief. It reminds you that you’re part of a bigger circle of people and purpose. Unhealthy validation keeps you reaching for another hit, another like, another “good job” just to feel steady for a moment.
I’ve fallen into both sides of this. I know how energizing it feels when recognition aligns with effort, when someone genuinely sees what you put into something. I also know how empty it feels when you’re refreshing a feed, waiting for attention that doesn’t really mean much.
Like with many things, it comes down to using it as wisely as possible to push you towards a better version of yourself. Let it motivate you, but don’t let it define you. Let it remind you of connection, not replace the harder work of self-trust.